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I saw a rainbow in your eyes,
Soft as the notes of a lullabye.
The twinkle, the sparkle, sent my way
Lifted the clouds that filled my day.
My heart was opened without any key,
But alas, the rainbow wasn't for me...
©2004-2009 ~disgruntledlemur
:icondisgruntledlemur:

Author's Comments

"It's like one of those Vinland sagas," he said.

"How's that?" I asked.

"I keep expecting Vikings to come out of the mist," he replied.


I kept this one intentionally simple. I like it better that way.

Comments


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:iconspartacomplex:
Ohp. This gives me ideas <3
Lovely

--
"HE LICKED MY FIREBALL!" - Gally
:icondisgruntledlemur:
yay, I inspired somebody! My whole writing obsession is completely validated.

(I actually mean that.)

:heart:
:iconaladdin-sane:
Did you mispell lullaby intentionally? Because, if you did, that's quite a well placed little bit of word play.

--
-StationToStation-
:icondisgruntledlemur:
As a matter of fact, I did. I really didn't expect anyone to get that. I considered taking it out because I thought people would just see it as a typo, but I wasn't in the mood to compromise, so I kept it.

You get bonus points! Congratulations.
:iconaladdin-sane:
Lol, thanks. I'm one of those strange people who likes analysing poetry.

Thanks also for the watch, by the way :)

--
-StationToStation-
:icondisgruntledlemur:
No problem. I stopped by and read some of your stuff - free verse is nice when nicely done, but I believe that rhyme and meter are very underrated. It's nice to find someone else who appreciates them.
:iconschmiale:
I like rhyme and meter... does this make me a bad person?

Alex
:icondisgruntledlemur:
Not at all!

I like rhyme and meter too, and I swear the fact that I'm also a bad person is just a coincidence.
:iconradicaledward76:
simple, yes, but also quite beautiful. Your choice of words seems to give it a very mystical aura. I like very much.

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August 11, 2004
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